Choice

 

Lately, I’ve noticed a common thread among my clients . At their very core, they are struggling with trusting their decisions. I’ve heard it all, decisions about career moves, men, where to live etc, etc.

There is always that fear of making the “wrong” choice.

Can you relate?

I’m just as guilty too.

I was at a salad bar this week, one of those ones that have like 17 options OR you can choose to build your own.

I immediately felt anxiety upon looking at the menu.

Which one should I choose? Should I make my own? And if I do, what am I going to put in it? What if I choose the WRONG one and I don’t like it!? What if the other option is better? ahhhhh!!!

I know I’m not the only one who feels this way and this is just about a salad for the love!

This topic is so much bigger than that though. I realized that it applies to everything and that choice and decision making is a struggle for so many of us .

I got real with myself. Underneath it all, it’s because I want everything to be perfect and am afraid of what will happen if it isn’t.

Who’s with me on that!? 

We live in a world with SO MUCH CHOICE. An overwhelming amount.

My Polish Grandmother used to tell me she felt bad for my generation because we have so much choice. She said in her thick Polish accent, ” it just complicates things, Jessie”.

Was she right?

How are we supposed to choose? 

Where to live? Who to marry? What job to take? Where to eat tonight?

Sometimes we get lucky and a choice gets made for us, which makes things easier in a way. But sometimes, it doesn’t.

I’ve come to find seeking the “perfect choice” is the recipe for anxiety. What if we got comfortable with good enough? Don’t get me wrong, I’m not saying that we are getting comfortable with settling.

I’m saying we are getting comfortable with being confident that no matter what we choose, we can handle the outcome.

Every second of every day we are choosing and there are always alternatives.

So stop and think, figure out what you want–What do you ultimately want in life? What is important to you and what is especially important to you right now? 

Evaluate how important it is- How important is each of the things you listed?

If you had to rank them right now, how would that go? For example, is it your primary goal to excel in your career right now or meet someone? Getting clear on this will help you delegate your time and make choices.

Again, I think much of the time it comes down to trying to find the perfect choice that causes us to not be confident and to regret choices we do make.

Choice is a very powerful thing. It’s enables us to get what we want and need in life. Remember, nothing you choose is wrong. You will ALWAYS be ok, even if your “ok” looks a little different than you planned. Stay rooted and confident that you can handle whatever the outcome is.