Last weekend I was in Chicago for one of my oldest and best friend’s wedding. It was a beautiful day of celebrating that ended with an epic dance party evidenced by the black feet many of us had by the end of the night because we danced the night away barefoot.
After the reception, the best man and I got into a deep discussion about life . I told him that no, I don’t believe everything happens for a reason. That I used to, but the older I got and the more tragedy I heard about, the less and less I could make myself believe this. Little did I know that exactly at the time this conversation was taking place, that the horrific events in Orlando were unfolding at the same time.
And then a couple days later, mother nature showed us her power when the little boy was snatched and killed at Disney while his parents watched. And as if there wasn’t enough tragedy already in Orlando last week, a little boy who I have been following for years finally died of terminal brain cancer.
So in the city of Orlando in one week, we had almost every cause of tragedy represented. Hatred, Forces of nature and freak accidents.
It’s too much.
It’s very distressing to think that sometimes things happen merely through chance or accident. Telling ourselves that things happen for a reason is not bad. It’s a way of coping and a way of finding something positive in a negative situation which can be extremely helpful.
I am not here to be the authority on the universe because the truth is I have no idea. Despite all of our beliefs, none of us truly do.
Here is what I do know.
Life can be cruel and life can be unfair.
Things happen that will change us forever. Things will happen that demand new versions us that we never knew possible. Things happen and we are forced to deal with it whether or not we like it.
Here are 3 things that are helping me right now and I hope can help you too:
Feel your feelings: How fitting that my post last week was about this. Here is your chance to put this in practice. Everything that happened last week has once again reminded us of the unpredictability and fragility of life like a smack to the face . Being scared, shocked, desensitized and helpless are are very natural ways to feel right now. Don’t run from that. Find a way to acknowledge your feelings . This may be a good time to invest in some time with someone who is trained to process feelings and emotions like a coach or therapist.
Connect, Connect, Connect: When we are truly overwhelmed with anxiety, sadness and fear, the last thing we want to do is talk about it. Typically this is the time when we need connection the most. So talk about it. Be vulnerable. It’s courageous to go on about our lives in times like these but it’s what we have to do. Be around people who lift you up and give you a sense of purpose.
Be grateful and be courageous: It’s a great time right now to take stock of your life and see all the beauty in it. What are you grateful for right now? How can you show it? How can you show courage in your life right now?
The truth is life doesn’t get easier. But you get stronger, wiser are able to gain a greater perspective if you pay attention.
What are you learning right now about yourself?
I am silver lining finder. Throw me in any situation and I’ll not only find something good but I’ll also find the opportunity. That’s exactly what brought me to my coaching career. 
