100% of women I have coached have some relationship to perfection (myself included!) We are subconscioulsy *obsessed* with the way we think things “should be”. In many ways, this relationship to perfection has probably served you quite well in life. You are accomplished in some area and are probably known for always producing quality work. This is all great except…
When things don’t go exactly the way we want, or we get sidelined by life events, we judge the SHIT out of ourselves.
Even as I write this blog, I go back and forth on whether I should publish it yet, or if I could make it better and more perfect. HA!
We have this self-imposed impossible set of standards about evverrryyything. And when we don’t reach them, we go down the spiral that we are not good enough to be doing what we are doing. Or our inner critic tells us some story about how we are such a mess and we need to get it together. How everyone else seems to have it all figured out except us.
What would it look like if we actually accepted our imperfect lives?
How would that change things for you?
What if we stopped judging the SHIT out of ourselves when something doesn’t look exactly the way we want it to?
This is not a rhetorical question. Really just try to imagine for a second if you just accepted that things are always going to be a little imperfect.
Ya’ll, I legitimately hear some version of this story every single day, all day. I listen to all the ways it holds all of us back. All the things we talk our selves out of doing because we aren’t _(fill in the blank with something) enough.
3 things to consider:
You can’t do it all at once: one thing that is an absolute in life is that it is going to throw us curve balls. We will have to put things and goals to the side on occasion because we have to tend to other things going on in life. We get sick, someone in our family does, other various shiz happens. Don’t give up though. Stay true to your course and be careful to not talk yourself out of a long term goal because a set back happens.
Recognize where you are killing it: Somewhere in life, you are doing a great job. Don’t forget to acknowledge that. For example, I haven’t written a blog in over a month. I used to be very consistent with posting weekly, but the truth is, I’ve been prioritizing my live events and public speaking opportunities which has been going great. Remember, you can’t do it all at once!
Stop waiting for conditions to be perfect to act: You aren’t the type who procrastinates because you are lazy. You procrastinate because you are waiting for conditions to be perfect so you can give your “best work” and so you don’t “look bad”. This is what will keep your ideas forever in the “idea zone”. Done is better than perfect. Action is better than wondering. Trying is better than regret.
It’s possible to be better at this ladies. It’s possible to have a better relationship to perfection. It takes work and self-awareness but it’s probably the most important work we will ever do.
Accept your imperfect life. Love your imperfect self and have fun this weekend!
Yours in truth and tenacity,
Jessica
I am encouraged already.
Good stuff!!!!! I am #MissPerfection…and I mean that in the most literal way….the past 2yrs…after moving to LA from NC. I drove across country in a new 2015 Navy Blue {Heavy} Chevy Camaro…😉…And a broken heart…💔..that had been broken in at least one million and one pieces; during my 3 day drive..and 3000K miles, I began to break every lie, chain as every ounce of my past was immersed with the dust…as I drove to my safe haven…refuge..in LA…I made it!..and All Glory goes to our Maker….I didn’t drive in front of any 18 wheelers..but I did tbink about it… but I did heal over the next 2years….today…I recognize I was a mess…how perfect👌…during that time i kept a smile on my face when I wanted to cry..I showed up when I wanted to die…and I stopped asking “Why’…instead I said “thank you..”…there’s a reason for this…and like the true Virgo that I am..lol..I discover that it was for me…so I could see how much better GOD loves to see imperfect…so we can see ONLY Him as Perfect ..
Not sure why I told you all this…but you will 🙏…❤…
Thanks for listening…and thanks for choosing Tani Layne..she’s a remarkable friend & woman. I told her she’d speak to the world as our newest #financialexpert….namaste Jessica🙏